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  • asked:
    on November 16, 2021 7:49 am
    Hi Josh I've been in my current relationship with my boyfriend for three years. I had a teen crush on him which I shared with him during one of our conversations. We're both mid 40's have been in long term marriages and we're both divorced. I have one son & he has two young adult sons. He has a great career, owns a home & has a luxury vehicle but asks me for financial help all the time. He even went as far to ask me to purchase him a vehicle prior to him getting his new vehicle. I've given him money in the past & loaned him money which he never paid back. I have never been invited not one time to his house or met any of his family & friends. We've hardly been out together on dates, family events or with each other friends prior to pandemic. I'm not needy or nuisance to him but I would like to spend quality time with him sometimes. I'll send short text messages a couple days a week to check in but I don't get the same from him. I've also tried for months at multiple times on different occasions asking him in calm demeanor if we can talk but all he says every time I mention it is "not right now" or "I have a lot going on right now" I treat him with respect & kindness. I say I love you to him & he says "ditto" back to me. This entire relationship seems like a waste of time & energy. This make me feel frustrated, stressed & thinking he doesn't care.
    • Josh LoveTalk replied:
      on November 16, 2021 9:23 pm
      Hi, I'm shocked you've accepted such behaviour for 3 years. He is clearly taking advantage of you and does not want the same type of relationship you want. The first things I'd suggest is look inwards and ask yourself why you're allowing his behaviour? Once you fix what's within, the next move for you will be a no brainer
  • asked:
    on July 29, 2020 7:21 am
    Hey Josh, how does one overcome being grossly insecure in a relationship, getting over the feeling that every girl will snatch my boyfriend away, being so uncomfortable and monitoring who he talks to. My relationship is more than 2years and I'm still dealing with this problem. Mind you, the guy has done everything to make me feel safe, I know he loves me and is very serious with me. But I can't get over these feelings and it's really affecting us. I need to boost my self esteem and confidence levels. Please help me. Thank you
    • Josh LoveTalk replied:
      on July 29, 2020 1:48 pm
      Hi, Let me start by saying I admire your level of self awareness and that fact you're willing to hold yourself accountable. It's not always an easy thing to do. From experience the issue of insecurity is rooted in the way we've been treated in our past and/or our opinion of ourselves. A good place to start is to reflect and let go of any negativity or toxicity from the past. Don't allow anything from the past define you, forgive and close that chapter. The other and most important part is to work on improving the opinion you have of yourself and that usually begins with self acceptance. Accepting and getting comfortable with who you are would go a long to boost your self esteem and confidence levels. I'd suggest practising the following actions: - Remove yourself from toxic and negative environments and people. - List out your qualities (both strengths and flaws) and embrace them. - Highlight and show off your strengths. While using self awareness to improve your flaws. - Speak positively about yourself. Look in the mirror and tell yourself how amazing and beautiful you are as a person. It may sound silly but trust me, self affirmation can be magical in improving self esteem and confidence. If you'd like some more details or some coaching, you can email me on hello@joshlovetalk.com. Josh.
  • asked:
    on May 18, 2019 4:56 pm
    Hey Josh, how do you become more socially appealing if you are timid, withdrawn, avoid gatherings, what I mean is how do you stop being socially awkward and every time I try to get in to a conversation when I leave I feel terrible I feel I should have been quiet, I feel I let out too much of my self out. Is it an abnormality, I have been single like forever because of this. Do I need to see a counsellor 🙈
  • asked:
    on January 29, 2019 8:36 am
    Hey Josh, I think that a good sexlife is the most important thing in a relationship, the glue that will keep couples together. The last guy I was seeing was thinking exactly the same way as me and I think we connected very well not only in bed. The problem is that this man has a girlfriend. He doesn´t love her and he is not happy with her. They got a "surprise-baby", so that´s why he wants to stay with her. Do you belive that couples should stay together only because of a child? I mean, should this man just accept that the woman is not the love of his life or rather brake up with her? I know its not my problem anymore, because we ended. But I still keep thinking about his destiny.
    • Josh LoveTalk replied:
      on January 30, 2019 11:50 pm
      No, I don’t think anyone should stay in an unhappy relationship solely because of the child. However being a father myself, I can understand how a child being involved can motivate people to want to make their relationship work. The main issue here is that you chose to invest in a man that wasn’t available. I feel you need to accept that he has chosen to be with his GF and baby. Whether he’s happy or not and whatever the consequence of his choice would be has nothing to do with you. That’s his problem. Wish him all the best and focus on being happy and meeting someone that’s emotionally available to choose you as his only woman!
  • asked:
    on January 28, 2019 12:06 am
    Hi Josh I met this guy at a bar about 2 weeks ago, he's 100% my type. We've been talking since we met and sometimes talk till 2 in the morning. Sometimes we both fall asleep on the phone. Yesterday he told me he really likes me but not looking for anything serious b'cos he just broke up with his ex. Then he said he's happy for us to be friends with benefits for now and then see how things go from there. Why do you men do this?? I've caught feeling already and feel like taking the risk tbh. Need a guy's opinion pls
    • Josh LoveTalk replied:
      on January 28, 2019 2:45 pm
      If you’re fine being FWB, then cool! But if you are looking to take the risk with expectation that he’ll change his mind about being in a relationship with you, please don’t bother! He’s on a rebound and probably still talking to his ex. All you’ll get out of this is a situationship. Look, at least he was honest with you. Many only get to find out the truth alot later! I’ll suggest that you thank him for his honesty and keep it pushing!
  • asked:
    on January 27, 2019 3:18 pm
    Dear Josh, I have been single and dating for one year now after my divorce, and I have survived a couple of heartaches. I have noticed a certain pattern in these cases where I ended heartbrokened. We have had very strong attraction with these guys, but they have both been trying to escape me almost from the beginning, returning and then dissappair again. I know that they are both in a relationship with someone else now and probably that is one reason why they try to stay away from me. I am both sweet and sexy, but I wonder if it could be that they left me because they can not trust me as girlfriend. Our short relationships was strongly based on sexual chemistry, but it was getting romantic. The thing that left me so confused was that both of these dating periods ended with that I confessed me feelings for them, we had passionate sex and we were getting closer also on a deeper level, sharing life experiences. They seemed to sweet and I really thought they were feeling the same way. They seemed to enjoy my company and they left with a smile. That´s why it feels so weird that they both left me, without any true explanation. I am starting to doubt my inner voice, because no matter how much I try to tell myself that these guys were not in love with me, I still hear my inner voice telling me that they are not over me.
    • Josh LoveTalk replied:
      on January 28, 2019 12:35 am
      You mentioned that you knew 'they are both in a relationship with someone else'. If this is the case, no offence but they only saw you as the side chick. Hence why your relationship with them was based on sex and the reason they ran for the hills, because feelings were getting involved. Relationship with the side chick is not meant to have a deeper level, sharing life experiences, it complicates things. I do not believe for one second that these guys were into you, rather they were into what they could get from you - sex and a nice company! If you want a serious relationship, I suggest you move on from these guys and focus on finding a single guy that's emotionally available for a relationship. With your next date, take the time to get to know him as a person before investing your body and emotions into him. I like the fact that you see yourself as 'sweet and sexy', you deserve a single man that sees you as that and willing to compliment your awesomeness. All the best